As a child I would sit in my bedroom and listen to my parents “fight” with each other in the kitchen. The fighting was always verbal in nature, full of expletives, and highly emotional. It scared me, yet at the same time it intrigued me; I suppose the high drama of argument is fascinating.
I now avoid confrontation whenever possible, preferring to step back from the charged emotion of a situation and explore the problem calmly. This is the therapist in me.
And though I now recognize my desire to avoid confrontation, there was once a time when I was completely unaware of how I was dealing, or more appropriately, not dealing with anger.
Anger scares me. The possible damage involved and potential for hurt is what most scares me. All emotion and little consideration may be a thrilling form of catharsis, but the destructive power can be surprising.
But I’m trying to accept that anger is a natural part of the spectrum of emotion, rather than merely a “bad emotion” that should try to be avoided at all costs. And to never express anger, well, that’s just as toxic, isn’t it?
*Image by Barbara Natali from http://www.barbaranatali.com